The last few months have been full of opportunities to trust God. It seems as though every area of my life has been tested; however, family and finances remain center stage. Every step has required that I come to grips with the control I don’t have. And, as a result, I’m putting a little more effort into being fully present, being me, and being in awe. Read more
While I started this month excited and fully prepared to beast out the writing challenges ahead, on November 2nd, life barged in, slapped the pen out of my hand, wrestled concentration to the ground, and pummeled productivity into particles. I was caught off guard. One moment I was thanking God for the ability to start this journey with so much clarity, and the next I was convinced the universe was playing tricks on me. In a matter of days, I went from Full Speed Ahead Lane to What The What Blvd. It was unreal.
Though several family issues and a hectic work week lead to a pitiful start, in the writing arena, nothing was lost. Intense prayer has kept me from worrying myself into a ball of yarn and all of my loved ones are okay. So, no tragedies…just life.
With that being said, I decided I’d concentrate on all that has gone well since NaNoWriMo and NaBloPoMo began. My breakthroughs over the last few weeks have been specific to my returning to college and creating a budget that will allow me to do so.
Here’s a few:
– Mobile phone company – Prior to today, I was convinced that my mobile phone company didn’t want my business and that I should look for another provider prior to my contract ending in December. Today; however, I received amazing customer service from two representatives that not only helped me save money but were a pleasure to work with.
– Cable provider – While it appears that my next bill will absorb a lot of the cost associated with switching plans, my current bill absorbed all of the prorated discounts. The amount due dropped from $122 to $12.
– A+ Certification – The college I’ve decided to attend has encourage me to recertify. Instead of having pay for a class geared specifically towards becoming certified, I was able to locate free classes.
– Math book – I was able to rent a text book for $20!
Now, let’s try this thing again! 😉
The same God that takes care of me, is the same God that will take care of those I love.
Dear Writer’s Block,
It’s not you, it’s me. I’m to blame for accepting every excuse known to man. It’s my fault that I don’t show up early and often. Ultimately, allowing the normal scapegoats – family, finances, work, and the unexpected – to continue to distract me from the promises I’ve made to myself sit at my feet.
To a made up mind; these trivial things could never exist. For someone who has thought through and committed to the work required to gain momentum and escape mediocrity, this conversation might never take place. Again, my fault, not yours.
Up until now, I haven’t been able to create a plan. Up until now, my reply to your justifications for my lack of umph has been yeah, I guess you’re right and that’s simply not okay.
Time and time again, you have been faithful in protecting me from the unknown and, until now, I never considered the cost of that protection. Now; however, it’s clear and I’m sorry to have wasted your time. I knew this couldn’t continue indefinitely.
I’ve flirted with thoughts of having more than what we’ve had. Yes, I’ve been flirting with the idea of creating something different. I’m sorry if that’s hard for you to hear, but it’s true.
I’m sure there was a better way to handle this; however, this is the best I could come up with. After today, I won’t need you to protect me anymore. I think it’s okay to take the chances you’ve subtly warned me about.
It’ll be hard to figure out a way to replace all the time we spent together thinking about writing, but I have faith that through writing, it’ll get easier. Prompts alone might be just what I need to create a new and better writing life. Who knows?
If for no other reason, you’ve caused me to tire of this stagnant place in my writing, yet I know I never could have gotten here without you. I thank you for the lessons you’ve taught me, but this is the end.
From Day 1 of the Writing Prompt Boot Camp.